Some people just aren’t going to like you. The important thing is to dwell on that until you die.

I laughed out loud when I read this. It’s the Tinder profile of Donnie, 25.

Thank you, Donnie.


It was not a squirrel

It’s no secret I’m an active Tinderer. Tinderella, if you will. All the new matches and small talk get pretty tiresome after a while, and this week I decided that I would take a new approach.

“I propose that we each get to ask three questions. They can be anything. And then after that, we decide if we want to meet. You in?”

“Definitely. I’ll go first.” Continue reading

They call me Trouble, Miss Trouble

Guy: Do you prefer honeypot or little fitty? xx
Me: How about we just call me by my name?

And I never heard from him again. I guess an identity based not solely on objectification is a deal-breaker for this one!

Tinder at your own risk

Fucking gem of a conversation on Tinder at 1AM:

Guy: American girls know how to have fun?x
Me: Worst opener ever, one chance for redemption
Guy: I love going down
Continue reading

Generation Y Dating: A Summary

What happens on Tinder, stays on Tinder. (Unless you have a blog!).

Matthew: I would Voldemort your Hogwarts SO bad!
Me: Oh yeah? You think you could unlock my chamber of secrets?
Matthew: I reckon I could with my magic wand
Me: How’s your Parseltongue?

I’m so sorry, J.K. Rowling. 

All is fair in love and Tinder.

Do you know what Tinder is? It’s an app. It’s basically speed dating in app form. You see a few pictures of a person, and decide “Yes” or “No” – that’s the gist. If you both say “Yes” then you get to chat, and that’s where the magic happens. And when I say ‘magic’ I mean the best, worst, and most unimaginably absurd aspects of the human condition get unleashed. Search the blog for other Tinder posts- they’re always a good laugh.

Alex: Hey there sweet cheeks x
Me: Hello! Now let me ask, in all seriousness, if we met at a bar would that be the first thing you’d say to me?
Alex: Meet me tonight and you’ll find out.
Me: Bold. Give me 3 good reasons and choose them wisely. 
Alex: Cock. Cock. Cock.
Me: Not one of those reasons is worth my time. But thanks for playing, bye!